Tuesday, 15 August 2017

To Divine ~ Divination

To Divine ~ Divination
The ability to foresee, usually regarding the future
Many who practice any form of spirituality, Magical practice , even religion believe in & use many forms of divination .
Some groups believe anyone can divine , I'm one of those people . some groups only believe only a chosen person can divine .
While I believe we all can divine , because frankly we all have sight , even those we label blind have the ability to divine .
What I do not believe is that divination has to be one method , or all people divine in the same way . Even those who divine using the same method will divine in their own & unique way .
This isn't some long over drawn post & elaborate study on divination .
I'm just giving a few examples of different means of divination  Sharing ideas , of how I divine & perhaps how others do too.
Hey think of the art of diving water ! The water diviner ! Yes to foresee water !
That is divination
I'm mostly , well really just use folk methods of divination . perhaps the only divination I use would have at one time been an elitist form of divination . That is the art of bibliomancy .
Divination through reading .
 This for me is the actually probably the only form of divination which I use on my personal self . why ? because I can't manipulate the outcome LOL
 No kidding . This is what most who are full time diviners do they often do not ever do what is termed " a reading " on themselves .
Why because you want to control your outcome , that's why
A wonderful teacup reader I met told me she rarely reads her own cup , same with a card reader I know , why because you want to manipulate the reading .usually . not always but in my case usually I would .
 So yes get this Tarot , never , I have purchased how many decks . My family & friends laugh because I've turned up at their doors with yet another deck to give away that I absolutely am not using .
Weird eh as most of my ways are via sight & the sole reason I purchase tarot , visual LOL . Yes that's me , a terrible hoarder of calendars & tarot decks .
all because of the images .
So for self yes the art of divining through the written word , this was most commonly done via use of the bible , by folk common people , but before who knows when really just the wealthy could read & write usually . yet really any good old book will do . I tend to like day books & saint books , folkore stories as well.
I like most people have several ways of divining , the method I use most is that of omens , almost always . based on the wind , the sky , behavior of animals etc. omens are signs , some are learned from hereditary means others are just knowing  & the results after. experience is a big part of omen divination . feathers of eagle & other birds , presence of deer , finding antlers etc.
another form of divination I really like & enjoy is that of scrying , most practice this via using glass or water . I absolutely get nothing when using glass , however I love both fire & water divination .
While I'm not practiced at it I am really interested in the throwing of the bones for divination .
I have a big collection of jaw bones & I've tried several times to read them I didn't get much from it though so perhaps they have different purpose .
Then there is the reading of people , yes it is just like reading plants , animals , stones etc. some people like my eldest is amazing at reading animals , of course divination of people is also knowing human behavior mostly , which in turn helps us see what is to come .
for those who work with folk methods of divination it is often difficult to explain or put in words , it is often a more hands on , experiential form of knowing through time & familiarity .
I've a cousin who reads tea leaves ! This is now her business , I haven't a clue how to divine a tea leaf & I know it took her yrs to be so gifted at it . I believe she wrote a book about it as well.
Anyway below are some images of just a few examples of folk methods of divining .
Again I believe anyone can divine , so what might you use , what & how do you divine ?
Which brings me to the why of this post LOL
Tarot ! Tarot giveaway !
 Yes I'm giving away a deck
I haven't had a giveaway in who knows how long , why not yet another set I don't get anything out of but someone else may .
  going to post the giveaway & draw date in a different post

Scrying Fire , either outdoors or in

Candle reading , one can read both the fire & the wax

seeds ! yes reading the seeds , I loved reading these pomegranate seeds

bones a many in this house

throwing money out the window ... self expectation....

Its been awhile , we've got no pc right now so while I still handwrite journals each day It is difficult to type much content on a cell ph .
I've had several topics floating round in my head the past 3 weeks though & really needing to share ......
No I'm not giving away $ , throwing money out the window was just a line that came into my head during meditation .
 Meditation on ego & misery . Self expectation ,  negative expectation of self not others ( which is another whole subject )
Today this reading , it really helped me , see know , today was the day , I'm ready. I'd as I often do have a topic in my head or sitting in draft form for days . working things through .Ignorance is bliss. well , I guess that is the time it took me in that ignorance . Although I sure was not in a blissful state .
Did I want to know my truth ? Do you ?
Do I wish to open that can up , acknowledge the shit that's inside ? Am I afraid ?
Can I handle it without feeling I'm a worthless human being , will I demonize myself ? Will it hurt ?
all these that hold us back are fear driven . We all have fear , we all respond usually in not the most healthy ways either when it comes to fear .
So I have to get myself unafraid first off.
Looking at self , those negative facts , those negative truths . Most people want to just label others as either all good or all bad . We also do this to ourselves !
Ok back to looking at our negative side , our perhaps not so healthy side.
Yes I look at myself , self analyze . Yet you know what , look around you , listen , those closest to us also know that negative side . What are they saying ? In my healing 17yrs ago , learning & walking in discernment I learned what not acting in haste really means when it comes to listening .Often those of us who are risk takers while this can be a strong attribute we can also be extremely hasty in response , especially in a mean spirited way .  To not respond in defense at the snap of a finger , to not say mean words back , that it actually isn't a fight at all. It is just sharing their truth .
There is truth in what our loved ones say about us , truth about both our positive & negative . I'm not talking about nitpicking at someone's every little irritating fault either . in that case ignorance is bliss & we also need know when to move on & not point out all what we perceive as wrong . The point in helping someone with their negative behavior is to support them out of it , not nitpick at them & demonize them . Support is a totally different thing which helps another perhaps be empowered enough they can actually catch the behavior when it creeps in the next time & not need help from another at all.
Do I want to hear it ? Will I listen ?
So out of my ignorant nonblissful self I go
About 3 weeks ago I came to the realization my ego was hurting , needing self recognition . It creeps in . We all have it . I can't stand the feeling of it . Resentment & harmful anger settle in .  
I realized I was judging certain people for where they are at in their lives . their growth & learning .
Self focus in a very negative light . I haven't had that hard ego trip in yrs . It really popped in with a bang .
 So to counter this I began working on praise , on friending people rather than just ditching them . Enjoying what they share rather than judging it .
 I also was beginning to acknowledge my need to slow down , while I was busy judging those who are into fast paced learning , I realized my push of self to keep up .
This is neither how I was taught , how I learn or how I teach .
 I wasn't being me .
 So that ego really needed to come back to being authentic self.
 Ha , in a day , not on your life ! Remember I am slow , that is my true self .
No because get this even though I'd identified ego I still was extremely miserable , I kept blaming my cellulitius , my body being drained , it does play a toll on the mind when we've encountered a long term physical ailment . Yet no that was excuse , I was in need of reason , misery , this is not my norm , yes I speak of the negative but usually in a way that will educate .
I was just miserable day in & out .
 Why should I be in misery ? I mean I'm in my element , I'm working my magic , we've got the new homestead business started .
This is it , the trigger , the root . Slowly digging deep I was seeing , it was taking me a long time for this one . This acknowledgment of my misery , thankfully my loved ones do have some patience , tolerance etc.
As I walk in the woods & I listen , really listen , this is my altar , my soul , my spirit .
 It was that irritating $ issue yet again !
 My morals , my integrity , my whole being was tormented . Again it creeps in .
I was miserable & mean spirited . No I'm not a demon , yet I can have demon like qualities , I am not a mean spirited person , we are all capable of being mean to another though, every single one of us !
Yet our positive & negatives effect not just us , it effects others around us .
I could see I was irritating people . We all have faults , annoyances that irritate .
 I just couldn't stand being in this state any longer . Again Thank You husband for your patience .
I really did need to get this crap out . This issue of earning $ . No I'm not talking self sabotage , I'm not talking about not earning any $ . This is about the how ! & The insane trap I put myself into . Negative self expectation !
Yes I had expectation this summer would be a boom for product. Ha ha says Mother Nature !
False expectation , demon # 1 , I thought I'd be earning at least 4 times what I do in a summer , I've earned 1/4 LOL , counting your chicks before they're hatched demon #2 , I had planned in my head all the great things that would come our way due to $ missing what great stuff is right here demon #3
Sheesh , I can't say what a relief this was once I began to really dig . I really must've had a fear of letting these demons go because this has been several months of this shit .
 Really I can physically feel weight off my back . That misery lifting , not all gone but I really had to revamp in my soul what I was doing in order to earn $ & nope my morals , ethics & integrity just couldn't do it .
So yes I'm tossing the $ out the window . Take that false profit !
Regrowth , climbing out of that sludge pit .
 Being my slow self yet again , being the hippy dippy unschooling mum & silly granny .
I remember what I will ethically do for $ and will not do .
So I'm returning to that which makes my spirit rise , Those I respect & love in this world & others , My magic cat ninja , my grandmother & greats , Tasha Tudor , Jeanne Parvati , Sandra Dodd , Jeanne Rose , old hiipy women ....... looking up old Waldorf ways , Old in print copies of my compleat mother , sage woman & unschooling mags . Hanging out with my kid way more , touching , seeing & hearing
Again these are not excuses , this is the real me , coming out , re-emerging once again just like the beautiful monarchs that healed me all 33 yrs ago in MX they emerge again here today & next time I need it again , because there always will be need for healing ......
 Slowly not fast , not immediate , yet true emergence takes time it is not based on negative /false expectation of self or another  , remember that ! 

Friday, 26 May 2017

Terming it Wild ..........when word becomes trend


This is a Wild Craft

Ok then , I'm just going to come out & say it , I can't stand the term wild crafting . There I said it !
Yep I can't stand it , that term ............ this is a bitchy granny rant . I post love , I post sadness , I write bitchy shit . If you don't like , well, I just told you I'm bitchy ..............
Personally I love terms when used in proper place , when they are deserving of that which true intention , true realism & passion are behind it . Usually used in reference in regards to origin of the connection of beginnings .
This is why people who are raised & grew up in folk traditions do not use the term wildcrafting in regards to wild medicine & food collectings . We are harvesting , collecting , picking , pinching . Anyway Its like sticking the term liberal to all whatever stereotype box or conservative etc. the terms are really misused & mis represented
Wild Harvesting : The collection of Traditional & Indigenous Food/Medicine

Wild Foods are not those that people have taken seed & cultivated within their own space or even within the bush This is not even wild gardening it is Indigenous gardening & it is has & always have been done by traditional peoples . My dear sister teaches this I trade her wild food for Indigenous gardened food .
I plan to cultivate nettle on our land this is Indigenous now not wild . Wild means the plant actually seeded itself brought in on clothing , wind, animal dung .............
Wild Food & Medicine :

Indigenous Cedar I planted from seed not Wild & Wild Cedar Harvest

Wild Crafting , my grandfather was an amazing wild crafter , he crafted tools , he crafted canoes , he saw images in wood & bone , he built an amazing log home , he crafted fireplaces & stone steps that still exists long after 100 yrs within the community . He was a crafter he actually rarely was a harvester . getting the picture ?
Wild Crafting  &  Traditional Folk Art :

Another term that is now trendy I'd no idea how trendy it had become I remember a few of us who learn via traditional ways were discussing pagan/witch labels back in 2008 . We ( I was one of them ) said how we used the terms lay & folk because we are not classically trained via priestesses etc. in fact we connected with our common roots , its how we learnt & trained all our lives . many of us coming from traditional medicine folk people . it doesn't mean we don't read , attend courses but that is not our first mode of learning . we didn't set out to become nurses , botanists  & then return to learn traditional ways . it is the other way around for us . We always were the folk spiritualists the animists , the midwives , the horse doctors ...........
So it is incredibly insulting to me when the university trained come in pickup on a tradition & fad & label themselves folk practitioners etc. no You are a hobbyist . a folk witch hobbyist .Heck I don't even call myself a witch . I'm not . I am however a folk spiritualist practitioner midwife etc.
 Just like if I get a horse , a goat & some chickens I'm a farmer but actually in reality a hobby farmer . I've no intention of becoming a farmer .
Folk Magic /Spiritual :

Wild Women / People
some are urban some are rural & some are out of this world
 we eat dirt & have all kinds of shit in our hair
we know our region , the sky,  wind, soils ,  the calls of other wild ones

Thursday, 20 April 2017

drips of change

sometimes I seem on top of things , even ahead & then others I have those ah ha moments when I think " oh yeah , why am I just seeing this now "
Like Spring , hey well it is MB after all , perhaps my character is most like spring .Slow to start , jumping ahead , then regressing into full blown winter yet again .
my ah ha moment is realization coming upon reflection of change .
The joys the pains the slow & the just like that . all movement  in fact even within perhaps our own stillness change comes does it not .
a thought is like a breeze appearing & shaking a leaf ever so gently .
age is a huge changer .even our animals , our dogs exhibit change with age .
Our big old maple is changing , is passing , is dying . yet she drips on .
Cleansing drips . shedding . yet having new blood flow .
I think of the Cedar dripping this time of year . The experience of harvesting Cedar while Drops of water fall & wash . I am allergic to Cedar yet this wash does not bother me . It is one of the first cleansings of spring , so pure , it awakens me .
As I age in grandmotherhood this is change of evolution
I am at the point in life where I am now aware it will be my turn next .
My parents generation the ones who have made it to elderlyhood are going , moving on , leaving the here & now .
Watching my mother she changes as quickly in her aging as the first year after birth .
Her movement is ever so slow .
I have the thought now " I don't want my mum to die " & cry when this thought enters .
Before it was a known that yes your parent will pass on , at some point .
Now it is true , it is in my face real .
So I feel a rush to catch up with my mother , in regards to collecting information , in regards to spending time with her .
I also feel the need of great slowness.
 When in her presense to be slow with my ears , with my speach , with my eyes .
To really take it all in one must slow down .
So I am slowing , even more so than before .
hugging grandchildren , some yet to come & those growing ever so quickly the number teen will be entering very soon .
My reflection is showing me , tone down on social media .
Begin to write again .
Record & teach .
It is in this I am making change .
Our lives are changing as well as a unit , as a family .
Our business ventuire is in early stage .
I am preparing with a small group of women to create a lodge .
Our homestead business will help us get our dwelling up & I am more seeing as we walk with the land we will add to have families come who wish to learn as we have learned .
I don't know if this will be inner city families like us who wish to return to homeland or refugee families who came from rural areas & are now stuck in the city .It does not matter the where , if they wish to learn & experience I feel we are to pass it on once we have learned . That is true sharing & giving .
 The lodge . yes a huge ah ha moment .
a womb of willow . imagine that .
Ha ! traditionally a lodge especially for women is constructed of willow .
I had to laugh at myself . time needed to allow me to have many drips of change for that to come . for it to sink in .
So I am continuing this blog , this space for myself . For to express & share in the women's lodge .
The things which pass through my mind .
My folk practices & magical musings .
I may sell items for magical use , smudges etc.
However the actual business will be a new website for our homestead where we will offer product from the boreal & I can write about our setbacks & progress on the homestead . Offering workshops , cabins etc.
This is where I am now in my evolution
The drips have been dropping faster , yet it being only mid-late April I need to be aware a huge back step winter storm may appear at any moment .
So while the drips are fast, new blood flowing  & cleansing I am stepping gently & being kind to myself .
My true slow self in spirit , breath .........

Wednesday, 19 April 2017

dealing with online bully


this is my response to dealing with a bully online via social media . & even though my experience initinaly had the effect as it is whenever we are victimized the outcome has been healthy .
this is truely the benefit of having a great tool belt on .
I can't say enough how go out & attend all the healthy healing workshops you can on dealing with abuse , bullies etc. go to groups , get a personal therapist /counseller if you can . you may think it was pointless or not worth it . Not True ! we always recieve something , it maybe just 1 helpful sentence within the whole 2 hr workshop . you know how bad stuff can come back to haunt us , well get this,  good stuff comes back too !
So this was my experience & still is as I am finding my way in which to deal & heal .
writing helps in that it helps us reflect . for those who have trouble speaking often writing or drawing , painting is our form of expressing . that is why I say the line " there were no signs " is false in abuse of children . adults are so used to the verbal world . children communicate in so many other ways than just the verbal .
So my writing helps me & then what I have learned , that which is helped me , I then write it in a form it may help others .
last week I already irritated & dealing with anxiety from circumstances here in my non online life . one day read on a friends ( aquantaince clearly not friend ) status yet another hateful outburst towards one specific religion .
this was done via hatefelt speach . I had restrained many times from commenting . I know the why many have anger & express in this way .
 yet done under the guise of posting truth to educate which it was not historical nor factual truth . & when one is claiming to be a healer . if you cannot be humble enough to take time out to acknowledge you are hurt & need healing you are not a very healthy healer for others.
especially if it involves my family , friends culture etc. eventually I speak up to defend against a bully .
I just finally on who knows how many rant after rant regarding said religion , well, I'd had it . I posted in a rational way why & how her rants were not helping . I even pointed out if we are helping , via writing about abuses etc. the whole point is , does it help others move on , does it promote questions , looking further, reaching out , moving on ............ or does it drive people away ?
can we catch ourselves when we may be doing this , ? seeing our non helpful methods are just as important as knowing our helpful methods
ok it became clear anything I said was only enabling her to wish to argue . I apologized , said what I know to be helpful in smoothing things out by saying we both clearly feel we have been working with the same intent we just present in different ways .
explained I would retreat because I'd been irritated as of lately . so I gave polite apology & backed off.
next thing I know I was unfriended . really ? because we disagree . no unfollowing just unfriended . ok
yes I did it, I posted passive agressive sarcasism .   was hurt & tired . posted I was the more tolerent as I only chose to unfollow . I can be a smartass at times . was I weak , hurt , probably . is a smartass comment horrible , am I perfect ?
Ok so done move on right ? no apparently not !
 this person clearly stalked my pg after unfriending me . maybe she was curious . maybe , but not . it was clear she stalked me because she then began to send me nasty notes . which clearly state what she read on my pg after she unfriended me !
remember I did not contact nor reach out after I politely retreated from the initial hatefelt speach she had originally posted in the first place . it was these notes that finally broke me .  I asked her very early on to please stop insulting & harrassing me . she sent more .  after I asked her to stop !
I was falling apart & did block this person ..yet still I thought was I over emotional .?
was I reading this wrong ?
 My gf helped me learn to take screen shots with the ph. this is a modern way of recording !
so I sent my gf all the convos to go over 
you see how abusers get you thinking like that ? that is how that cycle works , how you end up 2nd guessing , you self doubt . you wonder are you insane ? this is actually a normal victim response to being abused/bullied
 I responded rationally & I clearly made effort to calm things & apologize , again !
 through all these notes this person does nothing but insult me , tell me how she hopes I have now learned via her teaching me . it is very clear she believes if I were to do whatever she says & believe what ever she says then I & the world would be on ( her ) right track .
arrogance , I guess I do appear to be . on social media can we not all appear like that ? if we show what we know . if we don't show weakness etc. however I don't think I am to be a nothing .
"   I am not destined to be a crack whore "
one of the most loved quotes of all time is from a young woman very dear to my heart it brought tears tears of joy to my heart when I heard them .because I actually know what it took for this person to get to that place where she could say that ! in her core she believes she is of worth !
I am a grandmother now who has learned & does know much .
yes I had very extemely difficult experiences , many of those whom I loved we lost them . So I also made some extremely amazing choices in early age . I did chose to live alternatively , that was me . I did seek to heal so then I could help others heal ..........
& I am not perfect , I clearly post my expereince & struggle all the time .
however write about what I know via experience & study . it clearly bothered this person that I chose to do that . yes I have experienced a lot . I write about what I know how & what I was raised in .
So when I write about narcotic addiction , sexual abuse traficking of children & street sex workers this is because I write from expereince & the strength the power the overcomming & the studies I then undertook to help in helping others .
So yeah homebirthing , homeschooling , mothering , alternative folk practices that is from my beginnings . I can actually write about it & write about what I continue to learn . this is not arrogance this is that I actually have expereinced a lot within my lifetime . those whom I love , my cultures I will defend if I see it being attacked & untruths spoken .
I have regrets I wasted time & did not expreience more ! yes I have regret . in fact I think you always should have regret LOL. regret can be positive & can have positive result ............
recently a friend asked what can I not do LOL well I can't ferment very well I do some because my partner likes it . I'm not an amazing cook but I love baking . I know nothing about motorcycles aside from my partner looks hot on one & my son I am extremely proud he can fix . I know nothing about plants in Asia . I don't know carpentry , knitting , how to survive in the artic , how a steam engine works , . some things I know nothing about but have interest in . somethings I know nothing about & I have no interest in .
As a unschooling mum of 6 I had opportunity to study whatever the heck I wanted I was raised to learn like that .
So yes I am taking strength in the women I become more & more like every day .My greats & grands my mother .
 return to the IAM . via them having my back .
I have a strong urge to watch Black Hawk video on youtube now & if I can figure out how to post it I will learning I wish to step back from certain social media venues & begin writing again .
 & yeah I am a terrible speller & I cannot figure out how to get blogger spellcheck working !